Blog writing + vacation = DOES NOT COMPUTE

OK, so I thought I'd actually be able to write on here a little bit while I was in England but it definitely did not work out that way. I don't intend this to be a particularly detailed post about the trip but I did want to share a few random tidbits that I observed while across the pond.

1) The bathrooms in London are few and far between. If you see a toilet you better fucking use it because you might hit a serious dry spell when you really need it. And that could result in wetting yourself. That's ironic. Even places that serve coffee and food don't necessarily have a bathroom, which I think is kinda fucked up. It's like they haven't figured out that what goes in must at some point come out. Also, what if you're like my dear Lea who MUST wash her hands before consuming food. You're fucked, that's what.

2) Europeans pick their noses WAY more freely than North Americans. As a young child I had it ingrained in my head that it was not polite to dig for buried treasure in front of people. We've all picked our noses (fucking admit it) but usually we are a) alone and b) in some sort of desperate circumstance involving a pointy booger and no tissues. Here's a prime example (and by NO MEANS the only time I caught someone nose-mining). We were riding the train from Cardiff to London and there was an attractive fella sitting across from me. His attractive girlfriend was there too and when she got up for a minute he starts picking away like crazy. Not a little "at the tip of my nose" pick, we're talking full on "I think I've got something stuck in my brain" picking. I looked at him, mouth probably agape, and he SEES ME looking and doesn't care and doesn't stop! Lea and Ashley do not notice because they're reading or something. As we neared London the couple got up and moved towards the door and Lea commented on how cute the guy was. At this point I crack up and proceed to tell her about his disgusting habits. Sure he's fucking cute, but damned if you can take him anywhere! Also, he was asleep at one point with his mouth wiiiiiiide open, but that's a completely different matter.

3) People haven't figured out how to walk in a reasonable fashion. I don't know if this is a Europe thing or if it's just something that occurs in super-massive cities that I would not be aware of since I live in a little city. While walking down a busy sidewalk people will just gradually slow and come to a complete stop in front of you and somehow manage to block the entire sidewalk. Also, people like to force you off the sidewalk when you walk towards them. Yeah, I know you want to walk along with your friend but would it kill you to step behind them for 2 seconds so that I don't have to walk in the street and get run over by the crazy ass drivers? That's another thing, it's weird to go somewhere where the drivers don't yield to pedestrians except in rare circumstances. I don't know if it's the rules of the road over there or if they're all just dicks. I'm sure they'd find it super weird to come here where every time you come to a corner the pedestrians have right of way. They'd probably run over a lot of people before figuring it out. That one got a little off topic, sorry.

From the above bitching you might think I didn't have a good time on vacation, but that's not the case at all. I had an excellent time, I just really enjoy pointing out the funny little differences between London and my own city.